I’ve begun tracing the outline of every scratch I’ve left on your back

lover’s scratches are visible yes,

but I’m talking about the internal too…

how far over have you strained your spine trying to understand problems

that aren’t problems

What bruises have my heaving steps left under the clefts of your vertebrae?

you stay and you love me!!

a depressive codependent artist that hates people and lives in a cave built out of different masks painted polished, primed FOR THE WORLD TO SEE!!

sometimes I’m sure you wish you got to see them

but baby you get the face. the thigh. the firm but unsupported breasts.

the flaws the freckles, and never going to smile again face

the period pained pinch of brows

you get the tears, and the promised years of “I Am Trying”

and i am .

and you’re trying.

and we don’t  have a cat or a kitchen table

but this is the best sandwich i have ever tasted, sitting on the floor

in front of the television

watching Adventure Time and coloring without being judged.

 

 

—effort